Piano World Home Page Forums Our Most Popular Forums Adult Beginners Forum Quitting the Piano

hi.
I want to share my experience about piano learning.
I am a man of 54 years old.I always did made music but I have no formal education on Piano.

Until the October of 2021 ,I had never made any serious effort to learn the piano.
I am saying this because when I was about 30n years old ,I did 4 lessons with a teacher before taking the most stupid decision of my life ,that is ,to stop.The girl that gave me these 4 lessons back then ,started me with the Beyer method.
The last 3 or 4 years I was thinking of learning the piano ,but regardless of my desire to do so,the longest I took lessons from the same teacher was about two months.
This is not to tell *I wouldn't care :I always found my teachers to be abusive with me.
Then I quit and go on to find another teacher.[b][/b]

The October of 2021 ,I decided to try online lessons so I took online lessons twice a week ,until this last week i had a fight with my piano teacher (more on this soon).I believe I made some significant progress with that teacher.To better explain this ,I am now able to play 5 minuets of Bach,
some songs of the Oesten's May Flowers and many simple songs found in methods like the Method Rose.

I decided that i dont want to continuw lessons with that teacher.I am studying alone using material from the Method Rose, Bach minuets and the Hervee Pouillard method.Once more I have somehow quitted the piano but I will pratice every day.

It sounds like you've only quit taking lessons. It's unfortunate that so many of your teachers do not seem to be a good match for you. You can certainly continue learning by yourself or perhaps consider trying again to find a teacher that will work out for you. If you have friends that are taking lessons from a teacher they like, that might be one way for you to find a teacher. Or, if you give your location, there might even be some PW members who know of or who are taking lessons from a teacher they like in your area. Good luck!

Why did you fight with your teacher ?

OK I'll bite.
Your post title is quitting the piano.
Your post itself suggests you're here for therapy.
If you're looking for sympathy, you may find it here albeit not from me.
If you're looking for support, you may find that too, also not from me.
If you're looking for advice, then I suggest you pose a question, or an idea which will provide an opportunity for some to share / help / whatever you want to see it as, and that creates the opportunity for you to learn.
Otherwise, if you want to wallow in misery, then yes give up the piano because it will cause you TONS of misery. Pianos are really good like that, they will punish you like you have no idea.
Sell your keyboard to someone who is willing to put in the effort, because that is what is required.
On the other hand, if you have passion, and drive, and consider that maybe you've been the problem all along, imagine the possibilities.
Maybe you're not teachable - some people are just not teachable.
Who cares, so what, then you learn by yourself.
If that stops you, then you never started in the 1st place.
No one cares how old you are, as much as you do.
Take the energy and invest it into playing instead and see where it takes you.
Or yes quit, which includes posting on piano forums.
Otherwise you're even bad at quitting, and that's a whole level of lame in itself.
Good luck.

If a teacher has lots of students, and they are seen in annual end-of-year performances, and doing nicely from what I can see and hear, then I would just listen to what the teacher recommends and teaches.

Aside from the lessons, it may be necessary to build up in areas that the teacher might not teach .... such as composition techniques, key change techniques, pattern playing techniques, chord inversions, and play-at-will (no book or score).

As the OP appears to have learned enough to keep developing piano skills via continued own learning from online sources etc, then that is good.

Now ...... if one continues to develop and practise, then that isn't really quitting piano.

I find this post incredibly mean spirited and uncalled for.

I had different expectations when I started piano. I learned violin in school so reading the treble clef isn't a big deal. Have to practice the bass clef. Reading music isn't my biggest issue so I focused on fingerings, dynamics, phrasing and other nuances.

Like a lot of people I started self-learning for a while. I went online to find the pieces ABRSM & RCM students play and I would find performances and demos to help me along the way.

Eventually got a teacher for group lessons. Everybody in class play as a hobby although the option of taking RCM exams is open. We're older adults including seniors who have no intention of becoming a professional musician. The learning environment is very relaxed. In a group of 5 we had interesting conversations during the lesson. We would start each lesson with 10 min. of a piece out of Hanon exercises. Then a piece out of Czerny Etudes. The rest of the class we'd play a piece from Faber Adult Piano Adventures (Classical piece) and another from Faber Jazz & Blues book.

I find 2 things that always give people trouble: the teacher & the repertoire. Most people only have a 1-hour lesson per week so we'd be practicing at home the rest of the time. A lot of people start piano with great expectations. Many think that once they get good at playing, they're going to enjoy it. My teacher is less of an issue than my music since I only have to put up with her for an hour a week. My pieces need to be enjoyable when I'm playing the same ones for a few weeks at a time. I don't enjoy every piece assigned by the teacher. I'd find & download pieces online. If a piece I like is too difficult, I can always find an arrangement for easy piano. I always have 1 piece outside the assigned repertoire that I'm working on.

A lot of older adults like my father feel that he has to rely on a teacher to guide him until he is good enough to learn on his own. Music is a personal thing. Whether my teacher is around or not, I always find pieces I want to learn and try them on my own. Don't know if your teachers are teaching children or adults. The learning process needs to be fun & engaging. I haven't meet your teachers so can't comment whether they're friendly or have a bad temper yelling & screaming all the time.

Some people quit learning something when they discover that it can't be learned instantly. Somehow in our society we're used to instant solutions. We have microwaves to get instant hot water or reheated food. There are ready to eat foods in supermarkets and e-mails that replace the telegrams and letters of the past. You can copy and paste in your electronic devices, etc, etc. During the tennis craze 50 years ago, many people gave up trying to learn to play tennis because they thought it could be learn without sweating. Learning to play a musical instrument requieres many hours of practice every day for months or years before you can get results. Some people don't learn not because they are not willing to put the effort and think that it's because they don't have the required talent. Any human being can learn the basics of anything. Of course, talent will be required if you want to excel above the average. I believe that anyone can have fun with the piano without having to become a concert pianist. What really matters is being motivated enough to start a long journey. No teacher will succeed with an unmotivated pupil.

Yes - it is true. Even people with certain talents in music and piano playing etc usually had put in some real hard yards themselves. Usually - the amazing and wonderful result we see -----when we see some talents (gifted or otherwise) doing the playing of pianos etc --- is from the hard yards and time that they had put in. Dedication/devotion etc. And it's not always like sweat and tears. Some people just put in the hard yards - and accumulated it because they have their own OCD interest or love for developing/training/practising. No problem with that at all.

Pianoloverus…thanks for calling it out.

Indeed. That particular post was most unpleasant and unhelpful.
To the OP: as PianoLover says, if you’re playing every day, you haven’t quit piano, just lessons. That’s ok. If you find you arrive at a place where you’re no longer making progress and want to resume lessons, there are many options, including online options. But if you’re having fun on your own, then that’s great. And if you stop having fun, you can stop playing altogether (whether temporarily or permanently). It’s all ok. And ‘permanent’ is relative, too. There are plenty of people (myself included) who stopped playing for many years, and then decided to resume.

Don’t worry about things, but enjoy making music!

Finding a teacher you can work with can be very hard especially for classical lessons. Most have been teaching the same couple method book so long they are on autopilot treating every student the same. They get upset if you ask a question they don't expect because they can't give the same answer they have been giving for decades. If you found a method you like why not just work on it on your own and then try to make friends with a couple local pianist willing to answer a question now and then in trade for some beer and pizza. Remember in the long run their is only one real answer to learning to play an instrument.... Do what works for you. That why cookie cutter teachers do more harm than good.

quite the opposite.In fact I was begging her for additional stuff to do ,and she was telling me "just do what I told you to do".
I also researched about piano works to study myself.I found a Mozart's beginner edition minuet and I asked my teacher her opinion about that.She was furious.She once told me "if you can't play this" -WHICH I FINALLY DID PLAYED - "then I don't know what to tell you".I asked her about Czerny op.599 ,Beyer Method,also asked her if I should try Hannon.
Her answer was "no".But I wasn't convinced.So I was keep trying to find what to study.

I have teached computer begginers as a teacher.There was never a complaint about me.I believe there is no such thing such a bad student.

this is nonsense.I don't care to even try and reply to these.

Well ,she won't answer the phone nevermind what.
I get it , she teaches me and get paid for that time, BUT , what if I have a question that stops me from making progress ?
Anyway I did respected that and stopped calling her at all.When I had a question I used to sent her a direct message.
From the very start I asked her to construct an intense program so I could have the maximum project.
I feel that it not happened.

During that last lesson ,she asked me if I have tried to use the metronome as she suggested,and i told her "Look I did tried that but because of the nature of the exercise [8th rest 8th 8th 8th] the clicks of the metronome (mind you ,but I might as well had spent an amount of money for a quality old fashion metronome :I didn't but for argument's shake).She replied that I should pm her and "after 2 hours max I would had replied to you.

I told her I find this unacceptable because it is HER TASK to demonstrate the way I should do that.After all I told her I am paying you to teach me ,you aren't giving me lessons for free.Plus you don't want to speak on the phone.
Quite honestly I find it extremely stupid a teacher asking for something she hasn't teached.

There are plenty of good teachers around that don't fit the above description in the slightest.

There is an aspect of fit you need to take into account with teachers. Don't be afraid to look for a new teacher. You wanted a more intense program than average, and this is not something all teachers can provide. It looks like some of this could be an easy fix on your end, just making sure you know how to do everything your teacher assigns you. Or not. From your post, I don't see the specific issue as her not picking up calls, which I can see why a teacher would avoid outside of paid lesson time. I see the more basic issue as that of fit. And it's a fact that not all teachers are equally good.

It sounds to me that you are a demanding student who basically wants your teacher to agree with you. I have several students who are doing advanced rep (so they already know how to play). If they were ringing me up or messaging me asking questions, my reaction would soon be "save it for lessons or book additional lesson time". There is no reason why a teacher should spend time for free outside of lesson time answering questions.

I don't think there is an answer to your problem other than find a teacher that you respect and then follow their guidance without questioning it, at least for long enough to see if they get results (say 6 months). The chances are that if the teacher is experienced, he or she will quickly have a very good idea of your capabilities and frankly I would get irritated too if I were teaching you and you were constantly seeking a different path: you would quickly become an ex-student.

The student / teacher relationship is a form of partnership. Maybe you could re-evaluate your own approach to all this and see if you can find a less confrontational way to deal with people you are paying to teach you. Part of that is respecting their private time.

It doesn't sound like much has changed since your original post Disaster in 2019.

You are quitting lessons, not the piano, and I think studying alone is perhaps a good decision for you. There are numerous on-line blogs and instructions that you might find useful. Good luck!

Well, the teacher is not a full time employee. You are paying for lessons and that's it. Its not like you are having a private coach 24/7. If you have a question, several ways: keep the question for next lesson, post the question on a forum or look for the answer by yourself and check out with the teacher next time.


I dont see why you would think that she has to answer to your phone calls ? I never called my teachers.


Thats quite professional of her.


Maybe she did but you dont realize that.


I told her I find this unacceptable because it is HER TASK to demonstrate the way I should do that.After all I told her I am paying you to teach me ,you aren't giving me lessons for free.Plus you don't want to speak on the phone.
Quite honestly I find it extremely stupid a teacher asking for something she hasn't teached.[/quote]

To me it seems normal that she needs to show you how to do things. But I think it is also normal that you experience difficulties on your own and then she can help you to osrt them out. It seems like you are quickly getting impatient and then go into a confrontational mode rather quickly.

Seems also like you expect faster and easier progress than what you experience and blame the teachers for that. Piano is very difficult and at the beginning the progress can be very very slow and painfull.