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#503135 - 01/29/08 04:06 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
Joined: Apr 2007
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Morodiene Offline
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Quote
Originally posted by Bassio:
Quote
Originally posted by argerichfan:
[b]
Quote
Originally posted by BruceD:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by J. Mark:
Maybe someone likes you, Bruce. wink
That's a kind thought, J. Mark, but I doubt it! laugh
Yeah, I understand. To invoke Professor Higgins, single "and likely to remain so".

And yet... was Bassio's post a referendum on a nice young woman in his life? Was he asking for a bit of advice? We can hope.
Alas no, my friend! I hoped it was the case, but unfortunately no.

And to answer BruceD's post: because I think we should have a fun thread every once in a while, don't you think? wink

I also wondered if anyone out there can stand the amount of "noise" generated by pianists while practicing laugh Because if parents cannot stand their son/daughter practicing .. why should the wife/husband/fiancee/girlfriend stand it? [/b]</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">We have a perfect solution for this: we remodeled my studio and put tons of insulation in every wall and the ceiling. Then my husband moved his Xbox360 upstairs, so when I practice, he plays. We can't hear each other...it's great!


private piano/voice teacher FT

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#503136 - 01/29/08 07:00 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Reaper978 Offline
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It has actually been my great displeasure to meet so-called classical musicians who don't seem to have any interesting personality, even when it comes to classical music. For instance, I once ran into a doctorate of piano pedagogy who did not know what the Chopin Scherzi were.

I have been utterly floored by the sheer number of performers who apparently don't listen to much of any classical music. Why are they musicians? It isn't a lucrative field. Shouldn't these people be doing mathematics or engineering or something?

On that note, real artists tend to be people utterly alone with their craft, and have little room for outside relationships. I have certainly noticed this in myself - at my age of 18, it is useless to venture into anything serious or long term with my peers. Women in their 40s have stricken me as being far more attractive on a personal and emotional level than women my age.

As far as I am concerned, friends and supposed intimate partners are many times only fleeting images. Give me art and people who appreciate it, damn it!

-Colin

#503137 - 01/29/08 07:36 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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J. Mark Offline
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Colin,

Maybe your best post ever. (And that's a lot.) There's a great deal contained in those few words. But mostly, I identify with the notion that true artists are people utterly alone with their craft.

It's an important choice many people are faced with in their lives. Personally, I choose not to be alone with my craft. I enjoy the love and companionship of my wife, my children, my friends. And I sacrifice any real artistic ambition in favor of that. ... Not that I have any talent, but I humor myself that I made that choice.

Choose wisely, friend. smile

#503138 - 01/29/08 07:55 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Betty Patnude Offline
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Colin said: "Give me art and people who appreciate it, damn it!"

And, Colin, I can't help but make the prediction that you will find them genuine and worthy as time goes by. You have a lot of offer in conversation, interesting subjects, love of music, searching for truth and revelations, too, I believe.

There is no reason who should not have the lifestyle you crave - just not overnight - it takes a while. And, people like this are entering your life all the time if you can get to know them and find your kinship.

Best!

Betty

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#503139 - 01/29/08 08:07 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
Joined: Jan 2003
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Kansas
Quote
Originally posted by Bassio:


I also wondered if anyone out there can stand the amount of "noise" generated by pianists while practicing laugh Because if parents cannot stand their son/daughter practicing .. why should the wife/husband/fiancee/girlfriend stand it?
if i can't practice i get quite agitated.

my kids love to hear me play.. they ask to sleep on the sofa so they can hear me practice while they sleep..

my husband times his day to nap and eat during my piano time if he is home

i make alot of noise. it certainly doesn't sound all that great.... at all. they love it .

-of course, i'm a great cook and they don't want me to go away


accompanist/organist.. a non-MTNA teacher to a few

love and peace, Õun (apple in Estonian)
#503140 - 01/29/08 08:17 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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BsAs
Im-possible matches:

. Same instrument: not advisable. Well... not for me.
. Two music teachers: no way... they will make very little money and will be forever unhappy.
. Man composer - woman singer: perfecto. They will cheat themselves all their f... lives.
. Man harpist - woman tuba player: a heavenly couple?

Make your match.

#503141 - 01/30/08 03:01 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Ragnhild Offline
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originally posted by Reaper978:
Quote
Women in their 40s have stricken me as being far more attractive on a personal and emotional level than women my age.
laugh

I'll tell you Colin, some women in their 40s would quite easily fall in love with you or Jason or Bassio or any of the very charming young men at the forum shocked

Fun ?, yes. Wise ? , no ! wink

The female tuba player/male harpist is probably the best suggestion so far...

Ragnhild


Trying to play the piano:
http://www.box.net/public/dbr23ll03e
#503142 - 01/30/08 08:08 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Reaper978 Offline
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Ragnhild - I just found it interesting to note. Of course, there are multiples more of people any age that I could not stand to be with, but it seems as I go up the age range people really start to gain those excellent characteristics of trust, emotional stability, depth, and experience.

It helps me to understand myself a bit more.

#503143 - 01/30/08 10:29 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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argerichfan Offline
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Quote
Originally posted by Reaper978:
...but it seems as I go up the age range people really start to gain those excellent characteristics of trust, emotional stability, depth, and experience.
With luck, you'll leapfrog your 20's.

I'd rather marry a good cook than another pianist...hey wait a minute... I am a good cook! laugh


Jason
#503144 - 01/30/08 11:47 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Geneva, Switzerland
Jason:
I'd rather marry a good cook than another pianist...

Following is the start of the very first conversation I had with my future mother-in-law, in their sitting room, having arrived by train late on a Friday night after a long day at work in London, to spend the weekend in the country:

FM-I-L: "Where's Jackie?"

MB: "In the kitchen making me something to eat. I didn't even manage to eat lunch today."

FM-I-L: "Well, she is such a very good cook. Did you know that she makes lovely cakes and pastries!!!"

This was the start of a Mrs Bennett-esque "please marry my daughter" performance[1] that continued unabated until we left on the Sunday afternoon. It was nearly 20 years ago, but it still makes me smile[2] to remember it. She was of course absolutely correct, and said cakes and pastries have been the bane of my waistline ever since smile .

Michael B.
[1] Including "she plays the piano and violin so beautifully", etc.
[2] And Jackie cringe laugh


There are two rules to success in life: Rule #1. Don't tell people everything you know.
#503145 - 01/30/08 12:04 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Quote
Originally posted by argerichfan:
I'd rather marry a good cook than another pianist...
Ohhh... I want to marry a cook. Doesn't even have to be great. Can't cook worth my life, I just bake. Bonus if they play the violin. I always wish I learned the violin instead of the piano.

#503146 - 01/30/08 01:26 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Quote
Originally posted by Reaper978:
[snip] Women in their 40s have stricken me as being far more attractive on a personal and emotional level than women my age.

-Colin
Ah, yes! Mrs. Robinson!


BruceD
- - - - -
Estonia 190
#503147 - 01/30/08 01:51 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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arp Offline
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Quote
Originally posted by BruceD:
Quote
Originally posted by Reaper978:
[b][snip] Women in their 40s have stricken me as being far more attractive on a personal and emotional level than women my age.

-Colin
Ah, yes! Mrs. Robinson! [/b]
And me!


(But Mr ARP had the foresight to snap me up at the age of 23!)

#503148 - 01/30/08 02:23 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Quote
Originally posted by Reaper978:
It has actually been my great displeasure to meet so-called classical musicians who don't seem to have any interesting personality, even when it comes to classical music. For instance, I once ran into a doctorate of piano pedagogy who did not know what the Chopin Scherzi were.

I have been utterly floored by the sheer number of performers who apparently don't listen to much of any classical music. Why are they musicians? It isn't a lucrative field. Shouldn't these people be doing mathematics or engineering or something?

On that note, real artists tend to be people utterly alone with their craft, and have little room for outside relationships. I have certainly noticed this in myself - at my age of 18, it is useless to venture into anything serious or long term with my peers. Women in their 40s have stricken me as being far more attractive on a personal and emotional level than women my age.

As far as I am concerned, friends and supposed intimate partners are many times only fleeting images. Give me art and people who appreciate it, damn it!

-Colin
Ah! Love is in the air! I remember when I was 18, it feels pretty long ago though I'm only 21 now. Things changed for me. When I was 18 i thought just like you. I guess you just have to meet the right kind of girl. I know I did, she will probably break my heart big time to, ha.

#503149 - 01/30/08 04:18 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Quote
Originally posted by Morodiene:
We have a perfect solution for this: we remodeled my studio and put tons of insulation in every wall and the ceiling. Then my husband moved his Xbox360 upstairs, so when I practice, he plays. We can't hear each other...it's great!
How much did that cost? I live in an apartment so I'm always conscious of my neighbours... Plus my mute pedal refuses to work anymore.

#503150 - 01/30/08 04:50 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Betelgeuse, baby!
Oh man, I suppose this matter would come up sooner or later.

For the record, the last time I fell in love, it was with a soprano. Before that, a pianist. Both never reached the point of engagement, though. I've been through that (with a non-musician) much earlier.

I often wonder who really said "both the joys and woes of love have been greatly exaggerated." It's so true!

I could only speak for myself, but nowadays, I am far too in love with my own solitude to even consider having a spouse. Generally, company makes me very cranky. As long as one doesn't confuse loneliness and solitude, it's all good (as far as I'm concerned).


The Solitary

My heart has grown rich with the passing of years,
I have less need now than when I was young
To share myself with every comer
Or shape my thoughts into words with my tongue.

It is one to me that they come or go
If I have myself and the drive of my will,
And strength to climb on a summer night
And watch the stars swarm over the hill.

Let them think I love them more than I do,
Let them think I care, though I go alone;
If it lifts their pride, what is it to me
Who am self-complete as a flower or a stone.

-- Sara Teasdale


Die Krebs gehn zurücke,
Die Stockfisch bleiben dicke,
Die Karpfen viel fressen,
Die Predigt vergessen.

Die Predigt hat g'fallen.
Sie bleiben wie alle.
#503151 - 01/30/08 11:59 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Antonius Hamus Offline
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Not so sure I see a point in choosing some sort of solitary existence. Wagner had a brilliant wife (Cosima), and might not have had the strength to keep composing without her. Beethoven tried to get & keep women, or a certain woman, but wasn't very good at it. He didn't choose his loneliness in any very meaningful sense, although I suppose he was able to come to terms with it. Mozart had a wife and children. And how many children did Bach have? Dozens? Liszt tried very hard to get married with Carolyn. His youthful adventures with Marie yielded Cosima, who was to become so important to Wagner.

There is a Seinfeld episode, called "The Soul Mate", where Elaine finds a "soul mate": they are united by annoyance at couples who think that having children is necessary for being able to live a fulfilling life. There is this scene: Elaine and George are having a discussion at the coffee house. Jerry, who was at the (public) phone with his new girlfriend, Pam, comes back to the table. Earlier in the episode, Jerry had been having doubts about his feelings towards this new girlfriend of his. There's a discussion between Jerry and Elaine. Jerry begins.

"That Pam, I am gaga over her!"

"Gaga over her? When did that happen?"

"Yesterday, sixish."

"Hah, well, perhaps we should double sometime. I'm pretty gaga myself."

"But you just met the guy!"

"Yeah, but we have a common goal..."

"A barren sterile existence that ends when you die?"

Elaine squirms and smiles in satisfaction and various other pleasant emotions, and replies: "Yeah."

#503152 - 01/31/08 12:28 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Auntie Lynn Offline
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Can I exchange the pianist for Billy Gates, Warren Buffet, Luis Dominguin or Fabio...???

#503153 - 01/31/08 02:05 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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argerichfan Offline
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Quote
Originally posted by Janus Sachs:
I often wonder who really said "both the joys and woes of love have been greatly exaggerated." It's so true!
I feel I'm finding this to be the case, but please tell me I'm not getting jaded before my time. I enjoy partying with my mates at the London clubs, but I really do love my solitude at home. There's nothing like it, especially when I'm working on a project for work with one of the CDs from my extensive collection of church music playing in the background. Such inspiration.

As for Colin, I wish this marvelously intelligent and sensitive young lad the best, but I fear he may be setting his sights unrealistically. When looking for a (soul) mate (here using the term outside of its British meaning) I sometimes think we subconsciously only want a carbon copy of ourselves, male or female, whichever applies.

I don't think it works out that way in the "real world", whatever that may mean.


Jason
#503154 - 01/31/08 02:59 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Quote
Originally posted by Cultor:
Im-possible matches:
. Two music teachers: no way... they will make very little money and will be forever unhappy.
Not totally impossible. There are more than a few "teacher couples" in my local area, and some of them are rather well-off and/or famous. One couple in particular arranged the rooms in their house so that they can teach simultaneously without affecting each other.

As for myself, I plead the Fifth. wink


Private Piano Teacher and MTAC Member
#503155 - 01/31/08 03:38 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Ragnhild Offline
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I hope none of you found me non-serious in this very serious matter. I just could not resist (since I'm a woman in my 40's) telling you that I find some of you to be very charming (and interesting and sensitive of course) young men.

I guess we all start out with a set of golden dreams, and usually they get broken one after the other. You might meet your soul mate (what is the British meaning ??), just to find that it's impossible for other reasons, or you might fall completely for someone who does not care for you at all. Life sometimes makes unexpected turns and leaves you in places you never wanted to be.

Being able to enjoy solitude makes life meaningful even if you've had some bad luck. And you probably first have to endure your company yourself before you can expect somebody else to.


Back to Bassios question, being engaged to a pianist would probably bring mixed feelings

a) You'd be extremely proud and feel like the chosen one.

b) You realize that the more success he will have the less you will see him, so what to wish for ??

Ragnhild


Trying to play the piano:
http://www.box.net/public/dbr23ll03e
#503156 - 01/31/08 11:03 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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I think I much prefer the sympatico relationship with my wife of 28 years (soprano that I met in undergrad) to the non-relationship evidenced by my parents that had (other than children) nothing in common. Common interests and common goals has proven to be a great way to be. Musicians marrying musicians is certainly a nice starting point. It's wonderful to still have this after the kiddos are grown, rather than staring across the living room at someone that seemingly you have minimal rapport with. BUT....I'm a little jaded, she still sings Strauss and I still serenade with Chopin.

#503157 - 01/31/08 11:51 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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I tend to have mixed feelings about the subject. eek I understand how music can enrich the lives of a couple (for example, the joy of playing a duet together). 2hearts I look at a partner overall and not judge by certain criteria...


...The ultimate joy in music is the joy of playing the piano...
#503158 - 01/31/08 01:59 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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well...if you can afford to have 2 pianos in the house, there's nothing wrong with marrying someone who plays it too.

I admit though I probably am very ignorant about it since many of you have gone through alot and after all I am still 20.

hotkeys: what you just said pretty much applies to me to.


Mastering:Chopin Etudes op.10 nos.8&12 and op.25 no.1, Chopin Scherzo no.4 in E major op.54, Mozart Sonata in B flat major K.333& Khachaturian Toccata
#503159 - 01/31/08 09:58 PM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Bill Finn Offline
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Quote
Originally posted by Amelialw:
well...if you can afford to have 2 pianos in the house, there's nothing wrong with marrying someone who plays it too.

I admit though I probably am very ignorant about it since many of you have gone through alot and after all I am still 20.

hotkeys: what you just said pretty much applies to me to.
You don't need two pianos, only four hands. That is called a duet. Perfect for me and my sweetie of 30+ years, and me.

Much closer that way as well. But she really does like to take up more than her half of the piano bench. ;-)

#503160 - 02/01/08 12:20 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Of course I would like to be engaged to a pianist--pianists are harmless, because . . . they spend their time playing the piano.


Baldwin SF-10 320152, Marshall & Wendell, Steinway B
#503161 - 02/01/08 12:21 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Secondo Offline
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they only get dangerous when they post on the Piano Forum.


Baldwin SF-10 320152, Marshall & Wendell, Steinway B
#503162 - 02/01/08 01:23 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Antonius Hamus Offline
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"He tried to make bold sweeping statements and feel outrage at the absurdities of life, but one could tell his heart really wasn't in it."

#503163 - 02/01/08 02:17 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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argerichfan Offline
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Pacific Northwest, US.
Quote
Originally posted by Antonius Hamus:
"He tried to make bold sweeping statements and feel outrage at the absurdities of life, but one could tell his heart really wasn't in it."
Bold sweeping statements... outrage... absurdities...

Is someone conveniently writing my material, because my heart is having a problem getting "into" it?

I love to read the pre-21 posts on this board, but it's all really past history for me. They are so idealistic, but somehow it doesn't relate as it should. What has happened to me? I feel as if I'm in this weird middle space.

The confident posts of some of our more mature members - Antonius, tomassino, BruceD, whippen boy, keyboardklutz, Janus, BDB, AndrewG, btb, Ted2- all have valuable things to contribute. I do relish it all, and apologize if I get a bit hotheaded at times. I'm just trying to work through things... ya know, it can be really difficult.

But sorry, no excuses. I do think it should be taken into consideration that this board is a learning experience for all of us.


Jason
#503164 - 02/01/08 07:12 AM Re: Would you prefer to be engaged to .. a pianist?  
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Janus K. Sachs Offline
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Betelgeuse, baby!
Quote
Originally posted by argerichfan:
I'm just trying to work through things... ya know, it can be really difficult.

But sorry, no excuses. I do think it should be taken into consideration that this board is a learning experience for all of us.
Well said! I don't think anyone stops learning. IMHO, no one should stop learning. And no need to apologize -- to anyone. For anything. I was surprised when I read this. And also, even old foggies like me can get hotheaded too!

And I think I understand what you mean when you write about being in a weird middle space. I can recall the past, um, experiences of my heart quite vividly (I'm sometimes afraid to read my own dairy) -- yet it's always with a certain sense of "that happened to someone else", or even as if it were a novel. Certainly it's not quite vivid enough to make me want more of the same! laugh


Die Krebs gehn zurücke,
Die Stockfisch bleiben dicke,
Die Karpfen viel fressen,
Die Predigt vergessen.

Die Predigt hat g'fallen.
Sie bleiben wie alle.
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