Thanks for all your comments - I listened to some interpretations (including mine) again after reading you comments, focusing on the phrasing. The left hand seems to be the key for improvement for me. I'm still concentrated on getting the right hand right - I need to be more in control of the right hand to free up resources to really listen to myself playing the LH. A good bass should give a good pulse.
I had lessons until is was about 18 but didn't really practice the I quite. It has now been about 3? years since I restarted by struggling through Bach's Minuet 115 and have been practising a lot since and I'm getting occasional lessons. I haven't discussed this piece much with my teacher though - we use the time to work on more complex pieces.
In addition to other comments, your version is really different from Gould. He is mainly playing in staccato, ...
Also in bar 32, you play a trill when it is a 3 notes mordent.
If you can speed quite a bit and put some additional articulation to make it come more alive, that should be quite good.
True - I just liked it better when played so slowly. When I play it faster, I play the mordent. btw, "Come more alive" is exactly what I'm looking for - thanks for putting it so succinctly.