This is an up-date to the thread, which I started back in January. I want to express my huge gratitude to everybody replying to my post. I received valuable advice, very helpful suggestions and also fantastic ideas on what books to read up on...
Here is what actually helped me and it sounds remarkably easy. In April my piano teacher of six years told me that he will be unable to teach me any further. He told me it was for health reasons however I was convinced that it was because I was the most untalented and useless student ever! When he told me, the little confidence I had, vanished completely and I even considered giving up playing the piano altogether.
It took me a few weeks to get over it and when I finally started lessons with a new teacher, I could not believe the difference! There are no more tears, I am focussing completely on the lesson without constantly analysing myself and thinking about how poorly I am playing. I am not feeling nervous anymore and there are no more â€œbadâ€ lessons. It is still tough and I am having to relearn my technique from scratch so I am working hard! Piano friends of mine keep commenting how much more relaxed my piano playing has become!
Itâ€™s not all going smoothly. Performing is still a struggle and my nerves are still a problem, but piano playing has become fun again!!! :-)
Can I please just say that there are no hard feelings between my previous teacher and me. I regularly attend his piano meet-ups and I regard him very highly and I canâ€™t thank him enough for everything I learned from him! ...but to everybody out there, who is struggling, perhaps sometimes it is worth looking for a better suited teacher, if things are not going so well.
Many thanks again and good luck to you all!