Cus, you're right. The minor stuff is much harder than the major. Because the possibilities that 6 and 7 bring when sharped or natural seriously up the game! If those two notes alone make things that more difficult well maybe that's a good way to understand how tangled but structured things can be when everything's freely chromatic. So that's all just a way to say rules are rules but when we HEAR the rules and internalise them we don't have to think about them and follow them!
.... There are many words that follow to describe very specific stuff. So ... to save time I've added, at the end, a file that shows more or less what all the coming words describe!!
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About the phrase. There's some DEFINITE GOOD STUFF GOING ON. Which is
1) all the lines - each considered as an individual - are excellent.
2) The PREPARE SUSPEND RESOLVE pattern has been used 100% correctly and as it should be used!
But .... there are a few troubles to point out too. As you go through the list you'll see 2 good things vs 6 problem things! It may look like that means there's more wrong than right. BUT. That's actually not the case. The problem is that one voice leading mis-step early leads to other voice leading mishaps. In a way it's like a road way ... Take one wrong turn and the odds of following that w/more wrong turns become greater and greater.
1) C min has 3 flats in the key sig. So that should be written in.
2) You've perfectly prepared an resolved the 7ths in the second chord. BUT. The interesting thing of that chord resolving to next to a ii chord (as the phrase does) is the ii chord has a b6 scale degree. That b6 scale degree is a dissonance because it's a flatted 5th over the root D. So the "problem with having the seventh in the VI chord as you do is there's no Ab to tie over into the ii dim triad. One way around that is to use inversions. But we're still w/root position only! But that says why inversions are so necessary. Which is sometimes an inversion is the ONLY way to get to one harmony or another.
3) There's always a solution to the problem of (2). The solution is let the ii dim triad be a ii half-dim 7 chord. Which means the C in the soprano in the second chord is the beginning of a PREPARE SUSPEND RESOLVE pattern. In other words, it's ok to have a seventh chord that doesn't have a fifth or a third.
4) Another solution to (2) is to go to a iv chord in m.2 rather than a ii dim triad. Because the iv chord doesn't have notes that have to be prepared ...So voice leading is pretty easy in that case because there's less detail to attend to.
5) The triad at the beginning of the 2nd measure has 3 roots and 1 third. But 2 roots are all that can get used there. The only the place for a 3 root chord is the last chord of the phrase!
6) If there were 3 flats in the key sig then the B in the G chord could be written with a natural sign and it's function as a leading tone would be totally clear.https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19895150/Cmin.png
... Hope there's not too much detail and etc. in here!!
... After I posted this I saw a problem in the bass line in the last example. Do you see it?