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#1986213 - 11/13/12 03:37 PM Stopping by again to say hi and bye  
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 3,925
John Citron Offline
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John Citron  Offline
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Posts: 3,925
Haverhill, Massachusetts
Hi folks,

Well it's been awhile since I've been here. I wish I could stay, but that's no longer in the cards for me. Sadly, my piano and music is longer part of my life. If anyone wants a nice Vogel 177T in excellent condition, they're welcome to it. I haven't thought about a price yet, or anything on that end in detail.

The reason for this is my neurological problems have progressed very badly and I've lost the coordination in my hands. I did quite well for nearly 7 years, even went back to school for music and piano. That was the best time of my life and surely wish I could go back. I thought it was bad then, try this now!

In February 2012 I managed to have a small stroke that affected my left hand. This was due to a medication side-effect. I have no complaints about my doctor. I happen to be one of those people that finds side-effects with every medication I take. This incident left my hand cold and slow. Today things are a bit better, but the spasm and cramps are horrible. This incident has added insult to injury on everything else that was going on at the same time.

At this point I can't seem to coordinate the hands to play consistently every day. I'm lucky to get in 15 minutes on most days. An hour or two is a bonus, but those days now are far and few between. In the past 6-8 hours was the norm with 1-2 hours being normal when working full time. People tell me that I should "just enjoy the piano", well that's hard to do when I play like a rank beginner. Heck I can't even play hands together most of the time. The left hand stops completely now while my right hand treks along like it should.

So anyway, this is a goodbye message. If anyone is interested in a used 5'10" Vogel grand in excellent, please contact me.

John


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#1986219 - 11/13/12 04:15 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 3,546
sophial Offline
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sophial  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2005
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US
John,
I'm so sorry to hear of your difficulties and hope that things improve. Maybe one should never say "never" ? even a short time of playing might bring you some enjoyment... But of course you need to do what feels right for you. I hope you'll say hello again from time to time as and maybe even have some better news... take care.

Sophia

#1986229 - 11/13/12 04:37 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 5,809
JoelW Offline
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JoelW  Offline
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Joined: May 2012
Posts: 5,809
USA
Man, this is just too sad. frown

So sorry about your situation. Wish you well.

#1986253 - 11/13/12 05:10 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,364
jotur Offline
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jotur  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,364
Santa Fe, NM
John, I'm so sorry. I really enjoyed your harpsichord recordings awhile back. So you've already put a lot in to other people's lives. Thank you for that.

Hope you have lots of support on your journey. You can always post again here at PW to get a little upper when you need it.

Take care,

Cathy


Cathy
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Practice like you are the worst; play like you are the best - anonymous
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#1986263 - 11/13/12 05:39 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 6,451
ChopinAddict Offline
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Land of the never-ending music
I am very sorry to hear that. frown I wouldn't sell the piano yet though. And even 10 minutes now and then might make you happy. Good luck with your recovery!



[Linked Image]

Music is my best friend.


#1986264 - 11/13/12 05:39 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,039
tomasino Offline
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tomasino  Offline
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,039
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Hi John,

I understand some of your pain. I'm a "has been" singer, a "used-to-be pretty good" singer, and I'm still a "wannabe singer" more than anything else in the world--but it's gone. Oh, I can still warble a bit, and be impressive for about five minutes or so. And then the vibrato gets out of control, and like you with your left hand, I'm quickly reminded--it's gone.

Over the years, I realized that once I had bonded to singing in my teens, I couldn't do without music in my life. I had to find another way. Luckily, I had enough piano background to build upon it in later life, and so I became a fairly decent pianist who used to be a pretty good singer. The keyboard nearly filled the void, although I'd still rather be a singer. And so I'm at peace with that, and so I understand--it's impossible to "just enjoy the piano," as your well-meaning friends suggest.

I don't have the answer for you, and don't know what might replace the keyboard for you. But maybe you should hold off on selling your piano for awhile, and maybe hold off on saying good-bye to Piano World too. Give it some time. If you're like me, music is surging through your veins, and it won't let go of you, even if you let go of it. You'll find a way to stay involved, I'm sure.

Very best wishes
Tomasino

Last edited by tomasino; 11/13/12 06:21 PM.

"Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do so with all thy might." Ecclesiastes 9:10

#1986268 - 11/13/12 05:44 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 20,313
BruceD Offline
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Victoria, BC
John :

I do remember a time when you were an active and eager participant in the Pianist Corner, before your physical problems really began to impede the enjoyment you gleaned from your music. Even later, I admired your stoicism and your efforts to overcome your difficulties or to adapt to them.

I am greatly saddened to read that it has come to this. I am quite sure that we can appreciate what a blow this must be, although we can't fully know all that you must be going through and how it must hurt, physically, emotionally and artistically.

I wish you well.

Regards,


BruceD
- - - - -
Estonia 190
#1986274 - 11/13/12 06:17 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 6,165
currawong Offline
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Down Under
John, I always read your posts and appreciated your contribution here and am very sad to hear about the turn things have taken for you. I've sometimes thought about what I would do if I could no longer play, and I believe and hope I could still find joy in music without playing, so I do hope you can too, and that music can still be a part of your life. If you feel you can, I hope you'll return from time to time.
My very best wishes.


Du holde Kunst...
#1986275 - 11/13/12 06:22 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: currawong]  
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2,534
RealPlayer Offline
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RealPlayer  Offline
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2,534
NYC
So sorry for your circumstance, John. That's very sad. We'll miss you; don't forget about us completely.

#1986278 - 11/13/12 06:32 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 5,448
gooddog Offline
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 5,448
Seattle area, WA
Oh, John. I am so sorry to hear this. Please stop in now and then and let us know how you are doing.


Best regards,

Deborah
#1986282 - 11/13/12 06:54 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,793
Piano*Dad Offline
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Williamsburg, VA
John,

I fully understand your reluctance to see your abilities deteriorate. I hope you find your piano an excellent new home. But consider this: we can still benefit from your insights into piano playing and music in general, and you can still benefit from the discussion and camaraderie of fellow music lovers here. Hang around.


#1986303 - 11/13/12 07:57 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 8,863
wr Offline
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wr  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2007
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John, I am so sorry to hear about this turn your health has taken. If you should feel the inclination at any time, do come back and let us know how you are doing, although I can understand that you might not want to.

#1986334 - 11/13/12 08:59 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 5,968
Dave Horne Online content
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Dave Horne  Online Content
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 5,968
Vught, The Netherlands
John, I don't think we communicated with each other but I wish you all the very best.



website | mp3\wav files | Yamaha AvantGrand N3 | Roland RD 2000 | Sennheiser HD 598 headphones
#1986344 - 11/13/12 09:28 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 156
yhc Offline
Full Member
yhc  Offline
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 156
NYC, NY
Very Sorry to hear about this. Wish you all the best of luck and don't lose your music.

#1986355 - 11/13/12 10:10 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: yhc]  
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 9,351
argerichfan Offline
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argerichfan  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 9,351
Pacific Northwest, US.
I echo the sentiments of the folks above. I loved reading your posts, and I will miss you. All my best...


Jason
#1986368 - 11/13/12 10:53 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 453
P I A N O piano Offline
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P I A N O piano  Offline
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 453
San Francisco Bay Area
I am wishing you the best in your situation- so sad to hear of this news. I immediately recognized your name, remembered many of your posts, too. Sending thoughts of strength and please keep music in your heart...

#1986424 - 11/14/12 01:48 AM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,446
Derulux Offline
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Derulux  Offline
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,446
Philadelphia
John, I sent you a PM. If it truly is goodbye (for now), then take care my friend. You will be missed. Please at least read my message before you take your leave. I, for one, would hate to see you go, but I understand well the frustration of not being able to sit in front of the keys in the way you want (if for completely different reasons), and the added frustration of discussing the very thing you love and can't have with everyone here in the forums. It was the reason I took a few years off myself.

No matter what your eventual decision, I wish you the best. smile


Every day we are afforded a new chance. The problem with life is not that you run out of chances. In the end, what you run out of are days.
#1986697 - 11/14/12 05:31 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 1,576
Ted Offline
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Ted  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 1,576
Auckland, New Zealand
I am saddened by this news. You were a highly knowledgeable member here and you always commented constructively and insightfully. To have to stop playing the piano would be an immeasurable grief but you can still listen, and with all the wonderful electronic gear and software around, perhaps you could embrace arrangement and composition. Maybe that wouldn't suit you, and suggestions are easily made outside the situation, but to give up the whole of music seems too terrible to contemplate.


"It is inadvisable to decline a dinner invitation from a plump woman." - Fred Hollows
#1986815 - 11/14/12 10:45 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 33
BethH Offline
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BethH  Offline
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Joined: May 2012
Posts: 33
WI
I am very sorry. At times I remind myself, as I am getting older, that I need to savor the time I have for piano. There are no guarantees for anyone what tomorrow, next week, or next year will bring into our lives.

Leon Fleischer came out with an autobiography a year or 2 ago. Nine Lives?? I can't remember the title. I imagine you already know, that he was extremely good and lost the use of his right hand for playing in his 30's. He definitely had some ups and downs in his life but went on to do many different things musically.

Maybe you wrote some right-handed music?

My husband, a good amateur musician, has had physical issues as well. He is losing his eyesight (macular degeneration), has pretty bad tinnitus, and has significant whole body numbness. He really can't play an instrument at a level that he would like to, either. In addition, his fingers just don't seem to work very well in his right hand anymore. So, it has been tough for him as well.

Thank you for letting us know.

#1986859 - 11/14/12 11:27 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,483
signa Offline
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signa  Offline
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Ohio, USA
it's just too sad to hear this, John. had always enjoyed reading your posts, but not this.

i haven't played piano for a while due to job changes, but you made me miss playing it now...

anyway, hope you get well and hang in there!

#1986877 - 11/14/12 11:40 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 18,137
Monica K. Offline

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Monica K.  Offline

Platinum Supporter until Dec 31 2012


Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 18,137
Lexington, Kentucky
John, I am so sorry to hear of your latest health problems. It just sucks all the way around. I know there are people who can say that it is all part of a plan and that people can gain so much through facing adversity blah blah blah, but I don't buy it. Sometimes life is JUST FRICKIN UNFAIR and AWFUL THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE FOR NO REASON. mad And I think this is one of those reasons.

I can understand your desire to leave piano at this point. Use the time to develop a passion and hobby that your mind can utilize even if your body betrays you. I will miss your posts but am happy to have benefited from your insight as much as I did.

Take care.


Mason & Hamlin A -- 91997
My YouTube channel: http://www.youtube.com/pianomonica
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#1986941 - 11/15/12 03:37 AM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,264
btb Offline
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Pretoria South Africa
Hi John,

Always good to hear from you ... but one of the things you taught us was always to look forward as we can do nothing with what has past.

Don’t sell your Vogel ... that like dropping anchor in the dead zone.

Your hearing, I’m sure is as acute as ever ... surely a recording of Ashkenazy playing a Chopin Nocturne still stirs the blood ... all is not lost.

Hang in there ... we need you.

Kindest regards, btb

#1986984 - 11/15/12 09:08 AM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 424
Temperament Offline
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Temperament  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2010
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Hun,EU
Hi John, while sad enough, but don't think You have something special!

We all will cease playing our pianos from a given time. You perhaps - and very probably myself as the next one for some similar health problems - some earlier as the others.

It was no different for the great giants (I mean Beethoven & Co.) - they had to take on the biggest losses among all of us.

You are not alone, we all are not alone! Stay with music... Attila

#1987123 - 11/15/12 03:34 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: Temperament]  
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 672
davefrank Offline
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davefrank  Offline
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Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 672
Condolences for your huge loss(
Oscar Peterson lost his left hand abilities after a stroke and played/performed with his RH only for years..Jimmy Amadie, another fine jazz pianist, could only play for 5 min/day due to horrible tendonitis, and recorded a solo CD over the period of a couple of years..

food for thought perhaps..

Dave Frank

#1987164 - 11/15/12 05:54 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 643
Chopinlover49 Offline
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Chopinlover49  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 643
Very sorry to hear of your situation. Keep up your spirits--you never know. I hope things get better. Our prayers are with you.

#1987178 - 11/15/12 06:09 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,936
BB Player Offline
BB Player  Offline


Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,936
Not in Texas
John,

Although I realize it probably wasn't your intent, I found a lot to inspire me in your parting words. On those days when I am looking on practice as a chore I'll stop and appreciate it for what it is: a gift.

All the best to you and I'll join others in hoping that you resurface here from time to time. Your absence will be felt by all.


Greg
#1987180 - 11/15/12 06:16 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: BB Player]  
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 6,165
currawong Offline
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currawong  Offline
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Down Under
Originally Posted by BB Player
Although I realize it probably wasn't your intent, I found a lot to inspire me in your parting words. On those days when I am looking on practice as a chore I'll stop and appreciate it for what it is: a gift.
thumb


Du holde Kunst...
#1987190 - 11/15/12 06:35 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 6,451
ChopinAddict Offline
6000 Post Club Member
ChopinAddict  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2009
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Land of the never-ending music
Maybe this will encourage you not to give up or sell your piano:



thumb




[Linked Image]

Music is my best friend.


#1987198 - 11/15/12 06:53 PM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: currawong]  
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,173
Piano Again Offline
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Piano Again  Offline
1000 Post Club Member

Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,173
Washington metro
Originally Posted by currawong
Originally Posted by BB Player
Although I realize it probably wasn't your intent, I found a lot to inspire me in your parting words. On those days when I am looking on practice as a chore I'll stop and appreciate it for what it is: a gift.
thumb


Yes, this.

Best wishes in whatever you do.


Recovering cellist, amateur pianist.
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Check out my blog !

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#1987685 - 11/17/12 02:25 AM Re: Stopping by again to say hi and bye [Re: John Citron]  
Joined: Dec 2011
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Bluoh Offline
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Bluoh  Offline
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Canada
Good luck in whatever you do next, and remember to let the music live on in your heart. Stay strong.. smile


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