My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory,
but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack,
but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
After that, I tried being a Tailor,
but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory,
but that was too exhausting..
Then, tried being a Chef,
figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker,
but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was a Musician,
but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a Doctor,
but didn't have any patience.
Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory.
Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
I became a Professional Fisherman,
but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company,
but the work was just too draining.
So then I got a job in a Workout Center,
but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian
until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working in Starbucks,
but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT
AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!