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What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? #1918486
06/25/12 11:25 AM
06/25/12 11:25 AM
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jc111 Offline OP
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I read the other thread and thought I would ask my question.

We have been having piano lesson for about 7 months now and the teacher has told me this several times. I did ask him what does he mean and he told me that my son is quite musical and a quick learner that he thinks he can go professional if he wants. Though I am happy to hear those comments, I don't think my son is truly talented. He just a happy 7-year-old kid who loves his piano and in his own words "wants to play every piece perfectly so it could get crossed out".

For me, the word "talent" never come easy and it always comes with a lot of pressure. I kind of feel there would be certain expections after such comments though the teacher never said such thing. Maybe I just think too much into it and should just shrug it off and get on with life. I am curious to know if any of you have ever told your students and their parents that they are talented? And do you have any expections after such comments?

Thank you.

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Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918503
06/25/12 12:03 PM
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Everyone is talented.

Talent is measured in different ways and capacities.

I have many talented students. I have a 3.5 year old in the My First Piano Adventures who does many pages a week and can read better than my 8 year old who is in Piano Adventures Level 1 and is only now on page 25 after 7 months in this book (though she simply does not practice at all).

I have another who is good at composing, but hates to read music. And I don't mean she simply makes up sounds. She pre-writes and drafts many copies of her own music. She is just a bad sight-reader.

Another has great technique and learns concepts quickly, but because he does not practice, does not move ahead very quickly.

The list goes on with what each student can and cannot do. Every student has his or her strength. And sometimes it may not seem so because their strength may not be music.

But talent is not as important as dedication and work. Though it helps, more often than not, it is simply a guide to what the student will end up doing (because we enjoy most the things we are good at).

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918645
06/25/12 08:52 PM
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I asked a similar question here and now after almost a year, after two recitals, I can say I have a musical child who is also a hard worker and very intelligent. She has moved quickly and "talented" (per her teacher). I am not planning her life at age 10 (or at 15 or 20). If she has talent and wants a career in music it will have to come from within her. All I can do is provide a piano, time and a teacher. And strangely, if she wasn't a quick learner and she wasn't musical all I could do would be the exact same thing - give her a piano, teacher, and time.

So throw out the word "talented" and just focus on the process. Sometimes the word "talent" usurps all of the hard work your child puts into playing and that isn't fair to them.


Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918650
06/25/12 09:05 PM
06/25/12 09:05 PM
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I'm just intrigued at the notion of telling the parent of a 7 year old that the child has the capacity to "go professional" later in life. What does this even mean?


Teacher, Composer, Writer, Speaker
Working with Hal Leonard, Alfred, Faber, and Australian Music Examination Board
Music in syllabuses by ABRSM, AMEB, Trinity Guildhall, ANZCA, NZMEB, and more
www.elissamilne.wordpress.com
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: Elissa Milne] #1918651
06/25/12 09:08 PM
06/25/12 09:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Elissa Milne
I'm just intrigued at the notion of telling the parent of a 7 year old that the child has the capacity to "go professional" later in life. What does this even mean?

There are two possibilities:

1) The student shows extreme talent and promise in terms of musicality, musicianship, and physical prowess.

2) The person making the statement is delusional and/or lying.


Private Piano Teacher and MTAC Member
What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: Elissa Milne] #1918655
06/25/12 09:25 PM
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Originally Posted by Elissa Milne
I'm just intrigued at the notion of telling the parent of a 7 year old that the child has the capacity to "go professional" later in life. What does this even mean?

Look at it this way, Elissa,

Music Teachers can, indeed, be prophets! EACH ONE of my teachers DID NOT predict that I would go professional, and they were 100% right!

Ed


In music, everything one does correctly helps everything else.
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: LoPresti] #1918657
06/25/12 09:35 PM
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Originally Posted by LoPresti
Originally Posted by Elissa Milne
I'm just intrigued at the notion of telling the parent of a 7 year old that the child has the capacity to "go professional" later in life. What does this even mean?

Look at it this way, Elissa,

Music Teachers can be prophets! EACH ONE of my teachers DID NOT predict that I would go professional, and they were 100% right!

Ed


smile ha


Teacher, Composer, Writer, Speaker
Working with Hal Leonard, Alfred, Faber, and Australian Music Examination Board
Music in syllabuses by ABRSM, AMEB, Trinity Guildhall, ANZCA, NZMEB, and more
www.elissamilne.wordpress.com
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918658
06/25/12 09:37 PM
06/25/12 09:37 PM
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I wouldn't wish "going professional" on any of my students. It's a very hard and often terribly lonely life. What I would wish upon them is the capacity to make music fluently til the end of their days.


Teacher, Composer, Writer, Speaker
Working with Hal Leonard, Alfred, Faber, and Australian Music Examination Board
Music in syllabuses by ABRSM, AMEB, Trinity Guildhall, ANZCA, NZMEB, and more
www.elissamilne.wordpress.com
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: Elissa Milne] #1918702
06/25/12 11:55 PM
06/25/12 11:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Elissa Milne
What I would wish upon them is the capacity to make music fluently til the end of their days.


Absolutely, this.

Also, I think it's important (after Dawn Bennett) to reimagine what it means to be "a musician". If we take "musician" to mean only professional performer, then I am not a musician. But music is an integral part of my life; I engage with it every day, and I help others learn how to make music and make music theirs. I think under a broader definition of what makes a musician, I am a musician.

I am not aiming to create professional performers (and any student of mine with this aim and dedication I would pass on to a more suitable teacher quick smart!). I like to think I am helping to create musicians


Private piano teacher since 2003
Member:
ASME (Australian Society for Music Education),
ANZCA (Australian and New Zealand Cultural Arts),
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Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918846
06/26/12 10:21 AM
06/26/12 10:21 AM
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I think that the process of becoming a professional can happen without even mentioning the word “talent”. Kids who like music will undoubtedly want to participate in a variety of musical activities. If the kid is into these activities (performances, competitions, festivals, ensembles, there are endless opportunities), he will participate more and more, through which the right connections are made and self-assessment can take place. And he will, at the right time, decide whether he is capable of and willing to become a professional (and the specific type of professional). So my suggestion is to not mind what the teacher says about the kid being talented, but keep following the kid’s desire----send him to festivals and competitions if he wants to, sign him up for ensembles if he wants to, buy him a good instrument if there is the need… Things will fall into place.

My children’s teachers and I have periodic conversations about my kids’ strengths, passions and specific needs. I think these specific exchanges are more helpful than general ones (“talented” or not).

But also keep in mind that it’s hard to know whether a 7yo is talented enough to be a professional. It requires so much to be a professional (the right passion, the right work ethics, the right personality, etc.), the range of music professionals varies so much (being a concert pianist, being a school orchestra teacher and being a sound technician require some very different mentalities and skills), and kids can also develop a completely different passion as they grow older and are exposed to more activities. So support the kid but do not limit him by pushing him toward a direction at too early a stage.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: childofparadise2002] #1918858
06/26/12 10:41 AM
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Originally Posted by childofparadise2002
Kids who like music will undoubtedly want to participate in a variety of musical activities. If the kid is into these activities (performances, competitions, festivals, ensembles, there are endless opportunities), he will participate more and more, through which the right connections are made and self-assessment can take place.

These are social activities. Some people who have an affinity for music love the experience of music, but are not necessarily social beings. Too many such activities can interfere with pursuing music because you have to spend your time preparing for events. Meanwhile, self-assessment happens between you, the music, your instrument, and your teacher. Are you managing to draw out of the music what you want? I think the kind of assessment you're thinking about is comparing yourself to others, am I right?

Quote

My children’s teachers and I have periodic conversations about my kids’ strengths, passions and specific needs. I think these specific exchanges are more helpful than general ones (“talented” or not).

This is SO MUCH more important than talent or career. thumb

Quote
But also keep in mind that it’s hard to know whether a 7yo is talented enough to be a professional. It requires so much to be a professional (the right passion, the right work ethics, the right personality, etc.), the range of music professionals varies so much (being a concert pianist, being a school orchestra teacher and being a sound technician require some very different mentalities and skills)

Anyone considering music as a profession should also get a realistic view of what that means. Along with the good things there can be unfairness, politics, drudgery, uninspired conductors, students who don't want to be there (if you end up teaching), etc.

My child went that route. His teacher was dismayed when he saw the degree of talent in a late starter (beginning teens) and the expression was closer to concern than joy. In the specialized high school he got into next, the kids were told realistically that the world out there was rough and could be unfair. They learned a work ethic, but also to always be true to themselves and know who they were. If they did go on, they would be small fish in a large pond of other talented and trained students. Someone else might have connections, and or the right face and personality. When these kids did enter conservatory or music studies, they were not starry eyed hoping to be "discovered". They knew they'd have work to do.

Study music for the love of studying music, not for who you will "be". Enjoy the thing yourself. If you are a parent, enjoy your child as he is, and enjoy his enjoyment.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: keystring] #1918864
06/26/12 10:49 AM
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Originally Posted by keystring

These are social activities. Some people who have an affinity for music love the experience of music, but are not necessarily social beings. Too many such activities can interfere with pursuing music because you have to spend your time preparing for events. Meanwhile, self-assessment happens between you, the music, your instrument, and your teacher. Are you managing to draw out of the music what you want? I think the kind of assessment you're thinking about is comparing yourself to others, am I right?



Yes, because the OP was talking about being talented enough to become a professional. To become a professional one needs to consider things such as getting in the right school etc. Personal growth is a "given" for me (and hence did not talk about), whether the goal is to be a professional.

And I agree with you that studying music for the sake of loving music is a great thing----that's what I want my kids to do. But obviously people also need to address practical concerns (when they plan their professional route, for instance). People also have different goals when they pursue music (for example, to use music as a way to distinguish oneself, as discussed in another thread)...

Last edited by childofparadise2002; 06/26/12 10:52 AM.
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918870
06/26/12 10:57 AM
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I was writing about attaining the skills that could lead to a profession. I don't know if you read my whole post, especially the last paragraph.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: keystring] #1918871
06/26/12 11:00 AM
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Originally Posted by keystring

Anyone considering music as a profession should also get a realistic view of what that means. Along with the good things there can be unfairness, politics, drudgery, uninspired conductors, students who don't want to be there (if you end up teaching), etc.


Agreed.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1918876
06/26/12 11:07 AM
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This is goes under the category of a "realistic view" regarding piano jobs. I wanted to mention that our "flagship university" has only one full time piano professor.


Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: MaggieGirl] #1919012
06/26/12 03:53 PM
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Originally Posted by MaggieGirl
I asked a similar question here and now after almost a year, after two recitals, I can say I have a musical child who is also a hard worker and very intelligent. She has moved quickly and "talented" (per her teacher). I am not planning her life at age 10 (or at 15 or 20). If she has talent and wants a career in music it will have to come from within her. All I can do is provide a piano, time and a teacher. And strangely, if she wasn't a quick learner and she wasn't musical all I could do would be the exact same thing - give her a piano, teacher, and time.

So throw out the word "talented" and just focus on the process. Sometimes the word "talent" usurps all of the hard work your child puts into playing and that isn't fair to them.


Thank you for sharing your thoughts. The way you described your girl sounds very much like my son. I sort of feel the same way like you and sometimes found these "empty comments" annoying. I think I'll take it as the teacher is glad to have my son as a student and nothing more. I was truly surprised when the teacher's said "going professional". I think maybe he means to have a music degree or something. I do have a close family member who took that path and is now teaching music at a college. However, it's way too early to say such thing. I know there are parents out there who like to hear such comments and maybe our teacher is awared of that too.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1919018
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My son is a flutist and majored (briefly)in flute performance. He dropped that major after the first semester even though he loved performing. He said he realized he didn't want to spend college alone in a practice room and that is what leads to performing better. I knew it would happen. He doesn't do well alone for hours on end. He is the one heading study groups, outings etc.

My daughter (10)though is different, she likes "how music is made and makes her feel" and looks up composers who write for cartoons, apps and video games and emails them. She is happy working alone for long periods of time. I can see her very interested in the commercial side of music - something I think her piano teacher would be a little put off about and I know nothing about (I do have a friend who writes music for commercials but she is in Canada). Right now she is reading Phantom of the Opera and deciding how the score for the musical fits in with the novel and if the right choices were made - if they sound right. laugh

But there is so much time and so many interests at 7 or 10, I'd rather she explore many options before being pigeonholed as a classical pianist. :P

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1919062
06/26/12 06:06 PM
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What a cool daughter, MaggieGirl!


Teacher, Composer, Writer, Speaker
Working with Hal Leonard, Alfred, Faber, and Australian Music Examination Board
Music in syllabuses by ABRSM, AMEB, Trinity Guildhall, ANZCA, NZMEB, and more
www.elissamilne.wordpress.com
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1919194
06/26/12 11:42 PM
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She is a lot of fun. Her regular piano teacher was out so we were asked to reschedule with a different teacher.

She came out of the lesson glowing and the teacher was reluctant to finish. She said, Do you know how Mr M and I are alike? We both like to talk - a lot! She said time went too quickly.

Then she said she was sad she didn't bring her personal music in to class because he would have been fun to try it with (her reg teacher said it was too hard and not the right kind of music).

She likes almost everyone and always gets something good out of a situation.

Last edited by MaggieGirl; 06/26/12 11:50 PM.
Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1919414
06/27/12 11:04 AM
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Is your seven y/o socially mature? Does he grasp social concepts like space, speaking in turn? Does he take notice of your emotional state and act accordingly?

All the above have analogs in music. If your son has high emotional intelligence then I'd say there's a good chance that he's also talented.

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: prenex] #1919639
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Originally Posted by prenex
Is your seven y/o socially mature? Does he grasp social concepts like space, speaking in turn? Does he take notice of your emotional state and act accordingly?

All the above have analogs in music. If your son has high emotional intelligence then I'd say there's a good chance that he's also talented.


How interesting that you would ask those questions becasue my son does none of these. He is very self-eccentric but not in a bad way. He could be so concentrated on his own stuff (mostly math and drawing/writing his own books)that he could care less if the world is crumbling down around him. However he has a good heart and he does care for other people. He is the one who always looks after those special ed students when they come to his classroom. He tries hard to grasp those social concepts however they usually escape him when he got other things on his mind. I was really worried about him when he started school. Up to now all his teachers have told me how they love my boy so that kind of put me at ease.

I just asked him how much does he like playing piano and he said "100%, no actually 99% because the Hanon exercise is going too fast". laugh

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1919648
06/27/12 06:01 PM
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Well, you're the parent. (and spoken like a true parent too) You have a different perspective, and he probably behaves a bit different around you. I think from your description of what happens in school that your child definitely has what it takes. I would just smile, nod, look up to the sky and say thank you. smile

Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: MaggieGirl] #1920340
06/29/12 12:04 AM
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Originally Posted by MaggieGirl


My daughter (10)though is different, she likes "how music is made and makes her feel" and looks up composers who write for cartoons, apps and video games and emails them. She is happy working alone for long periods of time. I can see her very interested in the commercial side of music - something I think her piano teacher would be a little put off about and I know nothing about (I do have a friend who writes music for commercials but she is in Canada). Right now she is reading Phantom of the Opera and deciding how the score for the musical fits in with the novel and if the right choices were made - if they sound right. laugh


Awesome. Sounds like an amazing kid who'd be a joy and a challenge to teach (or parent)!


Private piano teacher since 2003
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ASME (Australian Society for Music Education),
ANZCA (Australian and New Zealand Cultural Arts),
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Re: What does it mean when teacher says my child is talented? [Re: jc111] #1921145
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Just remember that PDQ Bach met the young Mozart and predicted he would become one of the greatest snooker players of all time.


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