Piano World Home Page Forums Our Most Popular Forums Pianist Corner What's the equivalent of "Tooner" for pianists?

From my understanding, a "tooner" is a rank amateur fooling about with tuning. I thought it's quite a clever word, so I was wondering if there was an equivalent for pianists. It'll probably have to be a made-up word. Any suggestions?

Here are some words/phrases I've used to describe terrible pianists:

Hackers, Butchers, Hired Goons, Woodpeckers, Ploplopoodles (don't ask, there's your made up word...sounds like a Seuss rodent...hmm maybe it is? no copyright infringement intended), and "me."

This generally refers to the dime-a-dozen, girl-impressing pianists who churn out Maple Leaf Rag and Rondo Alla Turca a thousand times a day, mind you (except for "me"--I just play Alkan and Chopin-Godowsky a thousand times a day, terribly)..."dabbler" is fairly common usage for a more polite description of an amateur.

"Tinkler"

"aspiring artist"

Not specific to pianists, but the term “wannabe” (as in pianist-wannabe or wannabe-actor) certainly comes in handy.

-- wannabe-composer

Plinker ... or plonker.

Steven

When you use the word "tooner"
instead of "tuner," it's kind
of a folksy way of talking,
a way of being very informal
to the point of being comical.
This is how a hick would talk
in the US.

A rough equvalent for a pianist
might be "piani (pronounced
pie-ANNie) player."

You really do have a particular knack for posting utter nonsense. I know that the proper pronunciation of the word "tuner" is something like "tyooner." I certainly pronounced words like this properly when I sang them. But I promise you that I don't go around saying that I'm going to have my piano "tyooned." I say "toon." Am I a hick? I might be from the South, but I promise you that I'm no hick.

To clariy a little. Tooner and tuner
are close in pronunciation, but
the "u" in tuner is short and
abrupt, while the "oo" in tooner
is more drawn out, like a hick would
say it. But tooner would be
seen more in writing, for its
whimsical effect. For example,
when driving through a rustic area
you might see a sign like: "W. Dot,
Piano Tooner."

"Piani" by contrast is more of a
verbal thing, since the pronunciation
is so much differnt from "piano."

Welcome to Piano World of Pathology, where ignorance is bliss.

Steven

Gyro made the most serious attempt to answer the OP's question. He defended his case reasonably and soundly in my opinion.

It was characteristically nonsensical and delusional, and showed a complete misapprehension of the original question:

1. Tune and toon are homophones to most speakers of U.S. English, so the play on words in tuner/tooner isn't based on pronunciation;
2. Use of the word "hick" to describe people because of their dialect or idiolect is pejorative, to say the least; and
3. The cultural observations relating to humor, folksiness and whimsy are irrelevant.

Either you're a troll or, if you seriously believe your own statements, you need to be on my Ignore list, too.

Steven

I'm the the poster who asked the question originally.

I'm not exactly sure what Gyro is up to but he seems to have some...point...in his own convoluted way. However, I'm aware some people do pronounce "tuner" as "tooner" just because that's their natural way of speaking (but I'm not a native English speaker by the way). But I always thought of its usage here at PW as a play on words.

Now on to the original topic,

My favorites from the suggestions are:

Plonker, Plinker, and Tinkler

This is marimorimo, Certified Piano Plonkerâ„¢, at your service

Ivory tickler.

(as in, 'One who tickles the ivories')