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Worst thing I ever found was a pair of woman's panties behind the fallboard of a 6 month old grand piano. The lady of the house was FURIOUS! "THOSE AREN'T MINE!" are the words I remembered!

I tuned quickly and left! I'm glad I wasn't her husband!

So what was the owner's reaction?

I've seen people roll up "oregano" and smoke it.

I opened up an old upright once and two jumbo sized bags of stale potato chips fell out, but the all time winner in an old Chickering grand behind the damper wires was a 6 foot Python ... very much alive!

No tip? No way! Those cheap ...!!

When the oregeno owner saw me dive under the piano after the buzz he got REAL nervous and when I pulled it out he looked like I just convicted him to Alcatraz. I suggested he find other storage.

The 45K Steinway puzzle storage box:

Found 2 bras in a Baptist Church choir room Acro. Never found live snakes but a snake skin about 4 foot long.

Found jewel boxes with earings and necklace in the bottom of a Lowery console. Old lady was hiding them from her kids.

Hehehehe, I suppose he thought you were going to turn him in. That's too funny that he imagined that under the piano would be a foolproof hiding place for "oregano".

Were they trying to dampen the sound?

Now I want to take apart my piano and see what the last owner might have lost in there...before an errant thong pops up!

I found $1.65 in change between the keyfronts and keyslip on a spinet once -- the customer had noticed that the keyslip was warping and binding the keys, so she was putting in the coins as wedges -- but Larry's story has me all beat for dollar value. And some of the other stories make me grateful for my quiet life!

I won't tell you the worst thing I found in a piano but, suffice it to say, it was not a very pretty site and it was not an animal.

About 20 years ago, I rebuilt a small no name grand.
Failed pin block and bridges etc.
Client and I agreed that the tome was a little dull.

Upon removing the plate, I found an entire peanut butter and jelly sandwich stuffed between the plate and sound board.

Needless to say, improving the tone just got easier.

Client said their daughter hated the sandwiches and disposed of them all over the house.

I sent the newly rebuilt piano home with instructions on climate control as well as a suggestion to remove the PB & J from the menu ...

This is so funny!

Yikes!

But - reading these - I wonder, what's the ratio of gold coins/jewelry to dead animals/unmentionables ?

It makes me wonder if someone should be collecting all those free Craigslist pianos, pulling them apart, and profiting from years of diamonds and cold coins being hidden, dropped, or otherwise lost inside ?!

Well, if there are not enough valuables to make it worth while ...

At least you can clothe yourself ...

Or feed yourself ...

Yeah...I found "oregano" once in a piano owned by a college professor...this spice also featured a small pipe in the bag...behind the knee board.

"That must be my kids'stuff!" he said.

Yeah right...you're a college professor with a ponytail. I got a big laugh...this stuff was ages old...so covered in dust that there was no way to tell what it was except to.....

NO! I didn't! But, we did get a good laugh...

RPD

Years ago I was in a 3rd floor apartment on a winter night about to tune a old grand for two single girls. Half the keys were stuck and I could tell it was junk. Pulled the fall and there were forks, spoons, pencils, paper, cards, nail files, bobby pins, just tons of garbage. One girl made a terrible embarassed fuss gathered everything from me, went to the window threw the armload into the street, 3 floors below! Not mine to reason why...

'
This has stumped me on numerous occasions -

I've opened up a piano, and found a piano action & keys inside.....

where do they come from? !!!

I imagine she was the guilty party that had heard some versions of this over the months or years:

"Oh my god, did you leave your ___________ on the piano again? Do you realize how much that thing costs? Seriously, if you do that again, like, I am going to be, like, so totally pi**ed"

OR

"Do you have my hairpin/chopstick/barrette/fork/jigsaw puzzle nearing completion?"

Of course, the answer was always a version of "No, It wasn't me!" or "I don't have it"

You nearly outed her!

once i went to do a tuning job for an elderly widow. as always, she was "amazed" by how easily her piano came apart.. especially as i was taking the keys out to vacuum the key bed. anyways, there was a note in there and she excitedly opened it to find it a note written by her deceased husband to his lover!!

yes.. things became a little awkward

A little OT, but...

I used to enjoy the look on new crewmembers faces, when coming onboard a munitions ship, and I would mention that there was a bomb on board... quite a few, actually.